What's New - July, 2002
Monday July 29, 2002
Random Ramblings by CelineYo, dudes and dudettes. Today is yet another two-for-one ramble. Our guest this fine Monday is Lena, aka Jony, author of some very spiffy stories (The Apartment, etc.). You should read them. After you read today's update, of course. But really, read them. They're good stuff.
Since the best should always be last, you'll find her ramble below yet another lovely Tango the Wonder Kitty tale. Let me tell you a story...
Once upon a time there was a cat named Tango the Wonder Kitty, who lived a comfortable (spoiled) life as a strictly indoor cat (king). (Okay, so it's once upon this time, considering he's still alive and all, but I'm using the past tense because it seems to fit.) Anyway, Tango the Wonder Kitty liked to sit up in his favorite human's open window, staring out into the vast world, and occasionally reaching up to scratch on the screen and getting stuck there so his human would have to unhook his claws so he could get down.
One day this strictly indoor cat was sitting in the window, scratching on the screen, when what to his wondering eyes should appear? An opening to the outside world! Yes, friends, his clawing at the screen knocked the top part of the screen open. Tango, being the wonder kitty he is, seized upon this opportunity and made his way out into the great unknown.
Which, incidentally, came in the form of walking along the fence with the doberman in toe, meowing strangely and trying to avoid the evil clutches of my mother, who was in the yard varnishing an old wooden shelf my grandfather made. Alas, our furry hero was unsuccessful, as my mother grabbed him by the tail, and he was dragged back into the fortress (no, not by his tail).
But Tango the Wonder Kitty was nothing if not persistent. Later that same day, when his favorite human went outside via the sliding glass door, she (stupidly) left it open a crack to listen for the phone. Tango once again recognized a golden opportunity and managed to squeeze through the crack, and headed directly to a patio chair, which he stood under until his no longer favorite human picked him up and returned him to the evil dungeon.
Elsewhere in the big bad voodoo stronghold, his least favorite human sought to reinforce the window screen, thereby thwarting any further escape attempts, while ensuring a speedy emergency exit for herself.
Tango later discovered this wicked plot to further contain him when he clawed at the window screen and it didn't budge! Imagine the indignity of having to be rescued by his most vile human because his claws were once again stuck on the screen!
To this very day, Tango the Wonder Kitty can be seen, staring out the now impenetrable window, looking lost and forlorn... well, except when he's lounging on the bed, or getting fed, or getting treats, or being scratched on the belly, or when he's chasing the doberman, or when he's curled up with the cocker spaniel, or when he's laying on the computer monitor, or when he's knocking things over in the garage, or when he's laying on his still evil but convenient human's chest.
The End.
Before I turn you over to the very spiffy Lena, I would like to remind you all Tango the Wonder Kitty stories are true. Really, I couldn't make this stuff up. He fell in a garbage can, for goodness sake... why would I need to make anything up? ;)
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Hey y'all,
I'm Jony, aka Lena. You may have read a few of my stories, The Apartment, The Awakening, Ares' Gift, etc. And, if you haven't, why not?
When Raven invited me to ramble, the first thing that came to my mind is all the new beginnings I've experienced recently. I have a new nephew. My partner, Bookie, and I are finally moving in together. I'm getting a new cat, that I hope will show its gratitude by catching mice. I am writing my first ghost story and I had a snake in my living room; hence, the cat.
My Lab went to her reward Sunday from kidney disease. The house is terribly empty without my old friend, so my partner and I have decided to adopt a retired Greyhound. I can't believe that I finally got her to live with me, Bookie not the Greyhound.
If someone was to ask me why I write, I'd have to say it is to share the things, the issues, that I feel very passionately about; as well as, to exorcise some of my own demons. Hopefully, the finished product entertains and educates. I always write about things I am very familiar with. I make fewer faux pas that way.
Speaking of my passions, I'd like to share an experience with you. I volunteer now and then at the SPCA. A good Samaritan brought in two five month old pups that were left in the woods to die. A third one was already dead. Sadly, there was no more room, especially for very sick pups, and they were to be euthanized. The smoky colored female looked at me with such intelligence, pleading for my intervention, that I was a gonner. Thank God my partner is very patient.
I named her Shadow. Being a retired nurse, I was able to give the dog the medical care, with the help of my Vet, she so desperately needed. I've never known a dog so gentle and hungry to learn. But, my elderly Lab couldn't tolerate a puppy, so I set out to find the perfect home for her.
That scrawny, pathetic little animal, that had been thrown out into the woods like garbage, is now being trained in Search and Rescue work. I love happy endings.
Hugs,
Jony
aka Lena
visit my web page and join LenasGuiltyPleasures@yahoogroups.com
http://www.angelfire.com/tv2/xg//lena1.htm
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Thanks, fine bard lady. Sounds like you have a very giving heart to make that happy ending happen.
In story updates news, I'm a bit behind, so I'll try to play catch up in tomorrow's update. Thanks for your patience while I try to separate my head from my... um, posterior end. :)
What's New:
- Letter of Marque By V. Anderson posted at the Merwolf Academy of Bards (Beyond Uber Alt)
Set in the Caribbean in 1703. Female pirate captain becomes a privateer and works against slavery. Complete. - Letter of the Law By V. Anderson posted at the Merwolf Academy of Bards (Beyond Uber Alt)
Sequel to Letter of Marque. The continuing saga of Erin and Cecile. Complete. - Ripples in Time - Part 3 By Lois Kay and cbar posted at the Merwolf Academy of Bards (Beyond Uber Alt)
Continuing story. - We Do What We Can - Part 9 By Girl Bard posted at the Merwolf Academy of Bards (Beyond Uber Alt)
Continuing story.
Saturday July 27, 2002
Raven's Ravings by RavenTonight we have another wonderful bard and a personel favorite of my available to ramble .. so with out further ado...
Ramble for Blayne Cooper (aka Advocate).
First off, I should thank Raven for the invitation to
ramble and for all the interesting tidbits she
collects from folks and posts. Now comes the hard
part, thinking of something to say that anyone else
would remotely find interesting. But since this is
just a "ramble" I suppose I'll update folks on what's
happening with me on the writing front as well as some
thoughts generally. Those who bore easily might want
to exit now
I've recently finished a story that took me about six
months to complete. It's entitled: 'The Last Train
Home' - title supplied by none other than the very
sweet Judith (a.k.a. meshugge pup). With every story I
write or co-write I always try to focus on something
new. I use it as my way of convincing myself that I'm
growing a little as I play. 'The Last Train Home'
marks my first attempt at something gritty, or at
least as gritty as I could manage for a novel-length
story. It does contain some humor, but the humor is
very secondary to the drama. So far the response from
readers has been heartening. It's very cool that the
'verse allows bards to stretch their wings. Thank
you.
'Cobb Island' has recently hit bookstores. This one
has been a long time in the coming and it's a relief
to finally have it out there. It contains new text
and underwent some serious editing. I think it's a
much smoother read now, and I hope people have fun
with it. At this point, I think the thing that
excites me most about the story is the fabulous cover
that Callie created (on behalf of RAP). The two most
common questions I've received so from readers are:
why isn't it at Amazon.com and when will the sequel
come out? My answers: it is available at Amazon.com.
For some reason they were just a little pokey about
listing it this time. So those who have been waiting
so they can use a gift certificate (BTDT) go, get
wild! My kids will need braces someday
Advocate's Briefs (where my fiction can be found) has
a new url: Advocate's Fiction
Finally, T. Novan and I HAVE started writing the
sequel to 'Madam President'. For a while there she
was working on something and then I would be working
on something and then like two bard's passing in the
night, we'd miss each other. But no more! We just
finished Chapter One. Sorry, it's not available on
any lists in beta form. First, and trust me when I
say this, you really DO NOT want to read beta from us.
Well, I did say FINALLY, but that rarely stops me
Blayne Cooper (aka Advocate)Advocate's Email
I HIGHLY Recommend all of Advocate's wonderful stories and encourage you to read her tales and Feed the Bard! ;)
Now on with tonight's Fiction!!!
Hey All!
I have a fun ramble and some great fiction for you all to enjoy this evening! Tonight we have Larisa here to say HI! And to tell you all a little about herself!
I have enjoyed her stories and encourage you to visit Amazon Trails for all her works!
Now on with her ramble!
Hey ya!
Well, Raven asked me to do this and all though I’ve never done anything like this before I’ll give it a shot.
I’ll tell ya’ll a little about my self; I’m single, live alone and am quite boring. I very rarely speak and can be found lurking in a corner most of the time if I go anywhere. The most exciting thing that has happened to me in the last year, was coming home from work and finding my seven-foot, 95lb Columbian red-tailed boa constrictor missing from her tank. My main concern was my other animals, I have both cats and dogs and having Melosa (Snake) loose in the house was scary. After counting all my furry kids, I went on a search of the area where her tank is located. After crawling on my hands and knees and doing something completely asinine as to call her name, as if a snake is going to say “Ohh that’s me!” I finally found her in the most unlikely place…my waterbed! I forgot to mention that all my snake cages are in my bedroom. Yeah I know, not the best place for them. Anyway, after putting her back in her tank I made damn sure that she couldn’t get out again. Bungee cords and suitcase straps work wonders and so far I haven’t woke up with her in my bed. If there becomes a time when my stories just stop, you guys know she got loose, crawled into my bed with me and squeezed me to death. With my luck, the damn snake will go back in her tank after I’m dead and the county coroner will give the cause of death as autoerotic asphyxiation! Then everyone who knows me will think I was into kinky sex!
Larisa
Larisa’s stories can all be found on Amazon Trails :
Today's two-for-one ramble is brought to you by: Nestle's Tandem ice cream bards... er, bars. We have the very spiffy Carrie Carr, one of my favorite bards, and one of my favorite people.
And since I like to save the best for last, her ramble is below mine. Or maybe I just like to be on top. ;)
Anyway, I absolutely must start off today's update with a lovely Tango the Wonder kitty tail... dang it, I mean tale. I was sitting on my bed when Tango decided to go from my desk chair (which, incidentally, is the kind which you can twirl around in), to my printer stand, which... uh, stands directly behind my chair. Tango put his front paws on my printer stand and was preparing to haul his back ones over when the chair (say it with me now!) twirled, causing Tango to fall.
Right into my garbage can.
Butt first. Unharmed. Now, it's a fairly large garbage can. In fact, Tango's been in there previously, but that time it was on purpose (he has to explore *everything* you know). This time... well, he fell in, with only his little head sticking out, and immediately glared at me like it was all my fault. Or it could have been because I was giggling. Anyway, I got up to help him, but he managed to scramble out of the can by himself before I could.
Of course, Tango hasn't learn a darned thing from the experience. He still goes back and forth between my chair and printer stand on a regular basis, so he can climb up to the window. And he usually manages to knock something over. Fortunately, this was the first time he'd actually knocked *himself* over. I wish I'd been filming him at the time. I could have been rich.
Come to think of it, I think MTV or VH1 should forget the Osbournes or Lisa Minelli, and go with a Tango the Wonder Kitty reality show. I would watch, just so I can find out what on earth he does when I'm not able to keep an eye on him.
On the other hand, I'm kinda afraid to find out.
At the Request of a Bard:
Kim Pritekel has asked that we mention a link to her story, First, in the Palm format. So mention it we shall.
And now, we move to the great and rather large state of Texas, where our lovely guest rambler, Carrie, and her equally lovely partner, AJ, reside. Put on your cowboy hats and steel-toed boots, and read on, y'all...
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Howdy! A little birdie asked me to ramble, so who am I to say no? Okay, the birdie was actually Raven (not related in any way to Barbara Davies "birdies" - LOL!) but I'll do what I can. No promises though.
A lot has been said about "feeding the bards", and I agree - there's nothing more rewarding than getting a letter, or even a short note, from someone who read your work, and liked it. I make it a point to do just that, whenever I get time to read (also known as, "Writer's Block Hell"), and have made some very good friends along the way. But since this issue has been covered, quite well in previous ramblings, I have a bit of a twist on it: feeding those who feed (??). I can see the confusion on your face from here (back away from the screen, getting closer won't help it make sense), and I'll do my best to alleviate the blank look you have now.
Just as writers put it all on the line to post their work, a "bard-feeder" puts themselves on the line, too - just in a different way. They have to write a complete stranger (I know, some of us are stranger than others
You never know what might happen when you answer an email - you can make new and lasting friendships, or, like me, find the one person who completes you. I met my AJ through email - she wrote and told me how much she liked Destiny's Bridge, and we've been together for three years now. I can't believe how two people, from two completely walks of life, not only met but fell in love. *sigh*
I didn't used to believe in fate, or soulmates, or any of that "stuff" - I figured it was just the vivid imagination of writers that made us believe in things like that. Okay, so now I can admit I was wrong. I most definitely believe in the whole kit-and-caboodle (what the heck *is* a caboodle, anyway?) after finding my AJ. I'll have to tell you that story, sometime. It's something that I always enjoy talking about.
Oh, yeah. The ramble. Guess I got sidetracked, huh?
Anyway, to all the writers out there....feed the Feeders!
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to get back to writing my newest Lex and Amanda story. The beginning of the first part can now be found on my webpage, http://cbzeer.home.attbi.com on the Stories in Progress page (shameless plug!).
Carrie
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What's New:
Good Evening! Tonight we have Katia N. Ruiz as our guest rambler! I stumbled across her site and stories and Highly Recommend that you stop by and read her novela Noemi and her latest The War of the Vampires!
Now on with her ramble!
I wrote Noemi in an incredible surge of creativity in 2000. I spat it out in about the course of a month, and in the time since then I have been editing and making it better. I sent it in to be reviewed, and I'm crossing my fingers for its acceptance. I've been thinking about a sequel, maybe set a few years later, and concentrating more on the other main character in Noemi, though I'm not sure yet how that should go.
I've been writing a story for about a year. The way I saw it was as a long story, spanning about 10 years and centering on the lives of a small group of people in a very small town. I tried posting the story, and got a little trouble from different people talking about how long the main characters are taking to get their S..T together, so I removed the story and only an objective(patient ::laughs::) few will be privy to it. I don't agree with the ones that destructively critique without giving a constructive suggestion.
I rather like a long story, where there is growing up and self discovery and self acceptance before there is any true happiness. Maybe I'm not making sense, but that's the way I feel.
I'm thinking of starting to market my vampire novel, War of the Vampires. It's one of my favorites, and seems to have been a hit, as Noemi was, but not many people have visited the page. I'm working on the end, which is a mere few pages away, but all of what I have so far is available at my website.
I want to send readers in the direction of Murder by Association by Tonya S. Coley. As the title suggests, it is a mystery, and it's great! I've personally beta read it and edited it, and I think it's an awesome story that's moving along at an edge of your seat pace.
Thank u, beyond uber, for letting me ramble and ramble on as I have!
Katia N. Ruiz Kaita Email Visit her site The Tyger Tyger's Lesbian Fiction Homepage for more fiction!!
I have for you today S. Anne Gardner! Her works are a delight and I highly encourage you too check out her stories!! Now enjoy!
Hello Raven,
Always the inovator....thanks for asking me to come on and ramble....Here it goes....LOL....Rambling....about the work...
I have to admit the first story I wrote was pretty dark....but I guess I was going for what is not written about. The Seduction of Laura which can be found at "The Seduction of Laura" was in some ways the hardest I have written...it dealt with unpopular issues. I have always hated the "see no evil speak no evil mentality"....and I also know that even in utter chaos love can take strong roots. This theme kind of also carried over into Absolution (can be found at "Absolution" ) Passion can flourish anywhere. Never does horror deny us the loving or the pain. And yet in all there was love.....who can understand that.
We love for the wrong reasons, love the wrong people....and yet...loves manages to flourish in this terrain.....there is always a moment in which we have a choice and often in that one moment our life is decided on forever. Unfortunately, we sometimes make the wrong choices for all the right reasons.....this last statement sounds totally absurd....but anyone that has ever been in love understand it only too well.
I believe in writing about passion....afterall, its the only time that we are ever truly alive....passion is a way of life....loving...living...its being an active participant. I guess you can see I have very definite opinions...LOL.... I then started writing "Love in Grey Shadows" my ultimate statement on tolerance....and as unpopular as it may be...I really do believe it....Love is love no matter what guise it comes in. I fought hard to keep that one alive....I still do....I figure if people read it....maybe they will rethink some things. A pebble dropped in a pond makes a lot of waves.
Okay, so by this time I am well on my way of becoming the "Queen of Sick and Twisted"...LOL....Yeah...well...somebody actually said that...LOL....Passionate darkness..but never the less dark...LOL
No where to go after that but further down right?...LOL....well, life has a sense of humor....and I at the time didn't....well, I think I have one now....maybe....yes, and I do say maybe lightly....LOL... What happened to me I guess happens everyday...but I never thought it would.....I fell in love....mad as a hatter in love in lust the whole works....It was the worst and best time of my life. And I must admit....Yes I do publicly admit this....LOL....There were moments when I actually do believe I had lost my mind....Suddenly, I wanted to make all the stories in my head arrive at some point of understanding and Yes!....I wanted happy endings.
My work is posted because the one that holds my heart encouraged me....otherwise, I would probably still be just writing for myself and myself only. So....thank you Lisa, it is because of you that I am here rambling and feeling totally embarrassed....LOL....I think I am getting the hang of this rambling thing now.
Ummmm?......Have a rambled enough yet Raven?....LOL.....Raven is a hard task master....LOL... Okay, just a bit more then....LOL..
Okay, so after going from miserable to happy in my love odyssey I started writing stories like "The Very Thought of You" ..."Compensation" ...."For the Love of a Woman" and so on. All love stories also, but, with totally different expectations.
Okay, I have rambled enough about myself....LOL.... Lets really talk now! Would you do anything for passion? And I do mean anything.... I would love to hear the answers to that question.....We would all be surprised I think. .I always considered myself immune to the ridiculous...LOL....When you are in love you do some really stupid things...LOL. Some I will never admit to.....LOL I better stop rambling now before I say something that will really bet too...toooooo.
Thanks again Raven, always a pleasure.
S. Anne Gardner Email S. Anne Gardner
Visit S. Anne Gardner and Lisa at
I'm filling in for our intrepid Beyond Uber editor Raven this fine day, because she just got home and is "pooped." I'm not sure what Raven was doing, but sympathy cards should be sent to ravensnevermore@attbi.com. ;)
Remember, this is a two-for-one ramble, so look below my junk to see the real catch-of-the-day, a ramble by K. Simpson (ROCFanKat)! So, sit back, and read on, friends.
So, here I sit, getting my daily dose of important news from The Daily Show on Comedy Central, and watching Tango the Wonder Kitty peacefully slumbering upon my bed. Earlier... well, earlier Raven pointed out the guestbook on the site was broken. Someone else pointed this out some time back, but by golly, I'd completely forgot about it. For that, I utterly apologize. But I can report I've fixed it, so you can once again be a guest in our book (http://www.beyonduber.com/guestbook.html). We would be honored by your virtual presence.
In other news, my brother called earlier and said he'd forgotten to call yesterday to ask if my 10-year-old niece (his daughter) could spend the night tonight. So she's here tonight. We played cards, we listened to music, she giggled until I thought she was going to explode, and now she's asleep. She was in control of the CD player, so over the course of 3 CDs, I'm not sure we actually listened to any song all the way through. In fact, all told, I'm not sure what we listened to would equal one whole song put together.
*** We interrupt this vital ramble to sleep ***
*** We now resume this ramble as the rambler has slept and now once again awake. More or less ***
Ah, sorry about that. Tango and I spent an interesting night preventing the various cats in the household from killing each other. Actually, Tango was one of bad boys involved. I'm not sure why, but the cats have been running around, hissing at each other, and getting into... ah, not bad fights (no injuries), but they're not exactly friendly little romps, either. And they make a lot of noise. If this keeps up, I might have to get them little kitty boxing gloves, build a boxing ring, and put on a lovely referee shirt.
Maybe I can charge admission.
Or maybe not.
On to better things... a ramble by K. Simpson:
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We All Will Be Received in Graceland
Yes, that Graceland, and Paul Simon may be right. The last thing I intended to do over Fourth of July weekend was go see Elvis's house, so of course, that's exactly what I did.
You should know up front that I'm not into Elvis. The music's fine, but the fans are disturbing. You know the ones I mean. Somebody started the Elvis-on-velvet industry, and somebody ought to stop it. These people are not right.
If you want more proof, here you go: At a folk-art show last fall, I saw a painting called "The Avenging Elvis Casting Down the Suburbanites into Hell." I'm not making that up. The year before, at the same show, I saw "The Last Temptation of Elvis," which was Elvis eating a jelly doughnut. I'm not making that up, either. We won't even discuss the Elvis-and-Jesus paintings at a different booth, because I might have said something really, really sacrilegious a split-second before I saw the artist standing right there.
So how does a person with this attitude wind up at Graceland? Circumstance. A friend and I were going to Memphis anyway and figured we might as well have a look. "At least we can say we've been there," the friend said.
We've been there. I have the photo keychain to prove it. And I have to say that the house and grounds are really nice. As for the interior decoration...well, the house and grounds are really nice. I personally wouldn't have wanted a Jungle Room or a round fake-fur bed with a built-in radio, but the stairs to the basement are worse. The whole stairwell is covered in mirrors, even the ceiling; going down it is a drug experience without the drugs. How do you suppose Elvis managed it?
So I was thinking uncharitable thoughts about money and the people who have it when I walked into a room full of those sequined jumpsuits. Some Elvis-in-Las Vegas special was playing on the monitors at the time, and there, by God, was the one he was wearing in the video.
I'd run out of irony by this time and could only stare at the thing. The decorations alone must've weighed as much as a tailfin Cadillac. I imagined trying to accessorize something like that and had immediate brain failure. Then I had further uncharitable thoughts about drugs.
But for all my bad attitude, Graceland ended up getting to me anyway. The reason was my dad.
No, he wasn't an Elvis fan. He was pretty much tone-deaf and could recognize only two songs. For some reason, one of those songs was "Hound Dog." Dad liked to sing it whenever one of his children was being obnoxious, which was often. So whenever I hear it now, I think of him.
I heard it that day at Graceland. And it turned out to be my favorite part of the whole tour.
All is forgiven, Mr. Presley. Even Viva Las Vegas. The next time I see those folk-art boys, I'm having some words with them on your behalf.
Unless, of course, they come up with something even better than "The Last Temptation of Elvis" this year. I already can't wait.
K. Simpson (KSimpson@the-devils-workshop.com)
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What's New:
Gooood Evening!!
Hope you all have been enjoying Bard Appreciation Month as much as I have! The rambles from the wonderful bards have been delightful and I am proud that they have graced us with more of their time and talent!
Just a reminder that we too enjoy hearing from you all and love to know what part of the world you hail from... so please take a moment to sign our guestbook!
Now with out further ado.. tonight we have Jules Mathews ..first story the successful and enjoyable story :
Now here is Jules Mathews!
I'm honored to be asked to ramble...but then i had no idea what to ramble on about! So i emailed Raven back and she said i could ramble on about anything! Funny when you're given the opportunity to ramble you never know what to do and then when someone wants a precise piece you have stacks to say! Go figure! On a personal note, i'd like to thank all those people that have emailed me about the story. I was very nervous at first posting the story - i'd begun to write Download as therapy for what was going on in my own life. Then i sent it to a few friends and they said post it - change your name then if it sucks no one will know it's you! :-) The feedback i got helped me to keep the process going as i had an obligation to finish what i'd started. It took a long time but it's finally completed - i also had good support from readers - no one piled on the pressure to update but they did send encouraging notes. Finishing the story was a great feeling as i'd finally written my first story. There will be a sequel started at some point in the next few months and i started an update list for anyone interested: julesmatthews-subscribe@yahoogroups.com .
I think it's a pretty neat idea to have Bard's Appreciation Month. I love reading fan fiction - my friends all wind me up when they see me with my nose in yet another book or pages and pages of printed off material, and even carrying my laptop to bed because the story is just too good to put down. They tell me there is life outside of fan fiction!! Say it ain't so :-) When i first began reading fan fiction i was nervous about emailing the writer but now i see how important it is to get feedback - but sometimes i am guilty of not sending enough praise or feedback to the talented writers out there - i do try but the first thing i am going to do after this is find the most current stories i just finished and write the bards again.
This month marks my first year in the USA. Although i miss little old England i am enjoying the experience of a new country and culture. I would like to wish all the Americans on the list a happy 4th July - ironic as it may seem! :-) So i think i've rambled enough!!
Jules
Those that enjoyed Jules's Rambling or better yet the story Download.. Please be sure and email with your thought and appreciation!!
Jules Matthew's Email
Today's ramble is late, thanks to two people -- first, Raven, because she sent me a ramble by new uber author KG MacGregor. That inspired me to give a look see to KG's story, Shaken (http://www.ausxip.com/fanfiction/macgregor/shaken1-3.htm). That quick look see turned into an all nighter, reading the story until 5am this morning.
And that, friends, is what I didn't posted sooner. I was caught up in the tale of Lily and Anna in Shaken. Which is significant, because I haven't read anything longer than a Mavis Applewater PWP (gotta love those!) in quite some time. I have a pretty big back log of stories I really want to read.
So, obviously, it's all Raven and KG's fault I didn't sleep, all their fault I ended up reading a very spiffy story, and all their fault this post is late. *sigh* Oh, the hardship I have endured.
Or not. Shaken is pretty darned awesome, so I highly suggest you read it. Right now. No, wait... read the rest of today's post first, since KG took the time to provide us with a nice ramble and all. Then, after you've read that, go on and read the story (and the rest of the stories listed below). 'Kay? Got it? You gonna do it?
Good. Glad we agree. And when you've finished, you'll feed the bard. Because, after all, this is Bard Appreciation Month. Actually, all months should be feed the bards. Because bards... well, they are awesome. They share their talents for us to enjoy, and feedback is their payment for services well rendered.
Anyway, that's the deal. I'll turn y'all over to KG now. Remember what I said, though. You wouldn't want Tango the Wonder Kitty to find out you didn't do as we discussed, would ya? ;)
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I'd been reading Uber stories for a couple of months when I first started thinking about the kinds of characters I'd like to see in an Uber fanfic. The more I thought about it, the more these little tidbits of dialogue or character quirks would germinate, and pretty soon I was filling in things that might happen to my characters. At some point, I realized that I had made up a whole story, soup to nuts. Trouble was, it wasn't really a story because I hadn't told it to anybody. With great trepidation, I began to write it down. I started sending installments to my Number One beta reader, and talking on the phone about where the next section would lead. The next thing I knew, it was written...the first version, anyway. But the last couple of chapters bugged me a lot, so I started reworking a couple of the threads and throwing out the stuff that strayed from the heart of the story.
I never dreamed in a million years that I had a creative side. I can't even match my clothes without help! So I say this to everybody out there who makes up stories in their head while they're waiting for a bus, or running in the park, or sitting in a boring meeting
And since it's Bard Appreciation Month, I'd like to say thanks to all the Bards for their inspiration and hours of entertainment.
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What's New:
Another two-for-one ramble! Look below for a nifty ramble from DS Bauden. Ain't it awesome how all these spiffy bards are rambling for us? Major kudos to Raven for rounding 'em all up.
You know, it's not easy coming up with something to ramble about. Sometimes, I personally sit here for literally *seconds* thinking about what I'm going to write. And then I remember I never really write *about* anything, so I stop thinking and start writing.
I pretty much live my whole life like that.
So, anyway, earlier I was taking a bath and I wasn't alone. No, friends, I was not alone. I had not one but *four* friends in there with me.
Okay, so they weren't in the tub itself. I was alone there. But there were two dogs and two cats in other parts of the room. Which is really saying something, considering the room is rather small, and one of the dogs is a rather large fluffy chow. When I got out of the tub, there were two dogs on the floor, one cat on the counter, and one cat on the floor with his paws on the cocker spaniel, kneading the dog's side. Guess which cat that was? Yep, Tango the Wonder Kitty. He does that to the dog a lot. He sometimes meows rather loudly when he's doing it, at random intervals. It's fun. Good times.
In other news, it's time once again from some fascinating talk show topics!
Ricki Lake: I Want to Walk a Day With a larger Chest!
Jerry Springer: I'm Having a Lesbian Affair With My Own Sister
Sally: I'm Ashamed of My Looks
And now, DS Bauden:
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Hello everyone!!! It's so great to be back at the Beyond Uber Rambling session! I'm so pleased to have been asked back! Raven's the bestest ever!!
So okay... Have you ever had one of those days that just is a comedy of errors? Like everything you do is just SO not you? Well, let me tell you, I had one of those days today. And I am TRULY happy no one was home with me today to witness everything that happened. So let's start so you all can see what an idiot Di is on an off day. It doesn't get more off than this either. ;)
I was seated at my patio table outside writing, just minding my own business when a HUGE bumble bee came to see me. I'm talking a tater tot with wings this thing was so big. I mean this thing was so big it looked like it could've eaten the same lunch I had earlier. Well, needless to say I FREAKED out! I hate bees more than anything well maybe not spiders but that's a story for another time. So my eyes got all cartoony in size and the only word that came to me was an expletive that I don't think I should share here. Yeah the "f" one. So I swivel in my chair knocking into the table and spring out to try and escape. Well I turned around only to have Mr. Bee staring at me from less than two feet from my face. Which made me shriek quite loudly. I tried to make a break for it, but he followed me again so I ran towards the backyard. Now there is a height difference between the concrete of my patio and the lawn so.... Yep, you guessed I went ass over teacup and belly flopped onto the lawn. I stubbed my toe, scraped my knee on the way down and did a face plant into the grass. Not a pretty picture folks. I turned onto my back slowly to find that Mr. Bee decided to take pity on me and flew away. Out of sheer horror that I'd fallen in the middle of my backyard, I stood up quickly to see if any of my neighbors had witnessed my antics. I was trying to think of how I could play off doing that on purpose. Nothing was coming to mind since I don't have a pool or anything that would warrant me diving in the backyard. I sucked it up and looked around sheepishly, but found that I was alone. THANK GOD! I'm not a clumsy person as a whole, but damn it was pretty funny in hindsight.
But I'm not finished!!! After the bumble bee experience I tried to calm myself by watering my plants with the hose. Well it worked until I tried to turn the hose off. ( I know what you're thinking and you're right) I have a nozzle on the end of the hose that will shut the pressure on and off with a turn of a switch. Well, I turned the switch off and dropped the hose to the ground to turn the water off. Well, when I dropped the hose it switched the pressure back on and OF COURSE the hose turned on me and soaked my backside as I ran (again) towards the house to shut it off.
So NOW... I have a stubbed toe, scraped knee, wet back and ass, sponges
for shoes, and absolutely NO evidence of myself anywhere! I was like... Who's life am I leading today? Things like this don't happen to me. I guess it was just my turn. I have no idea. But regardless, I thought it would make you all smile if not laugh to hear of my adventure this afternoon.
Now, I suppose I should say something about my writing. First off, I wanted to thank all of you that have purchased my first novel A Sacrifice for Friendship. Your support is just incredible! For those of you that haven't purchased it, you can get it from The Open Book http://openbookltd.com, http://Amazon.com, Barnes and Noble (http://bn.com), Books A Million (http://bamm.com) and from my publisher with free shipping at Renaissance Alliance Publishing (http://rapbooks.biz). To say I'm excited would be the understatement of the year! It has been an absolute thrill for me to see my work bound. The first time I held my book, I cried like a baby. It's still so unreal to me and I feel entirely blessed. Thank you all who have supported my writing over the years. I can't tell you how important you all are to me.
My website is at http://dsbauden.com for my stories and music videos. My email address is dsbauden@attbi.com for those of you who wish to write.
They have dubbed July as Bard Appreciation month, but I think August should be Webhost/Webmaster Appreciation month. People like Beyond Uber, UFFD, Mary D, Academy of Bards, Forevaxena, Lynka's, Athenaeum... (I could go on and on) I don't think they get nearly enough accolades for the work they do. I for one, am truly thankful for the hard work they put in, most of them for free too, to get our work out for you all to read. Thanks guys. So let's declare August their month! Who's with me?!?!?!? Yeah!!!!
Thanks again to Raven and the folks at Beyond Uber for asking me back. It is always a great pleasure. Take care all.
Di
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Thanks, Di! And to all you fine, good looking, spiffy, and yes, even nifty Beyond Uber readers, *feed* *the* *bards*!!! It's a good thing.
What's New:
Good Evening Folks!
Life has been great but hectic with actually growing a social life.. did you know that all you need is sun, friends and a bit of cash .. any there you have it a social life:) This of course means that you have to put up with occasional missed post..but you know I don't like to let you all down so .. our favorite rambler has some time once again to post and you will be graced with Celine the Rambling Queen, Sunday - Tuesday evenings!!
So join me tomorrow in welcoming her back!!
Now I have not one but two talented authors this evening for your rambling enjoyment.. and it just so happens that their latest story just concluded and I Highly recommend you read this wonderful tale!!
Family Connections part 5 (Conclusion) By MJ and Cephalgia
So here they are with words of wisdom for all you authors looking for writing partners :)
Cephalgia: When we were asked to ramble once again, we wondered what the heck we could talk about. We really wanted to provide a useful educational experience, but what did we know about anything?
MJ: It was then that we had our brain wave... we would write an easy step-by-step guide to obtaining and working with a writing partner... including a few general hints on helping it to progress smoothly.
Cephalgia: So here is our guide to creating a successful writing partnership...
1) Find a partner. Decide on who you want to write with and worm your way into their good graces. This did not work with MJ so I had to resort to plaguing, badgering and brow beating until she gave in.
2) As with any committee there needs to be someone to make the final decision when a conflict arises. This decision is best made at the beginning of the project. Here is how we solved that issue...
C- "You do it"
3) Learn quickly that sometimes it is better just to go along with the flow. If you value your sanity then this is a vital piece of information! If ‘Yes’ or at least ‘oh for gods sake alright then’ are not in your vocabulary, then you may be in trouble
4) As the writing goes along, be sure to be supportive and use lots of encouraging words with your partner. Examples of our encouraging words are as follows...
· What were you thinking?
5) Late night / early morning on-line meetings are essential for thrashing out ideas. We spent at least ten minutes discussing the story before spending the next two hours locked in a contentious debate about chocolate supremacy. Ironic really as neither of us can eat it!
6) Have a bold plan for the story. A firm outline and concrete ideas about the characters and plot are essential for smooth progression of the writing... we plan on trying this out one day!
7) Correct spelling, grammar and punctuation are not optional. Don’t fall into the trap of self-editing. Find a beta reader! This step we shall also consider for the future!
8) Some people may find writing intimate scenes difficult. We each have a method for dealing with this. MJ suggests drinking copious amounts of alcohol, while I prefer taking my laptop into the closet. Although we found that either way leaves our vision a little blurred around the edges! I think in truth a good writing partnership is like life in general. It’s a matter of good luck, timing and chemistry. For those of you considering working with a partner, I can only hope you have the same good fortune we have enjoyed.
Well thank you both! To comment, abuse or argue with these two talented trouble makers you can email them at:
Now on with tonights fiction:
Good Evening Folks!
Sorry about the blank email I deleted the wrong email :) Oh Well!
I will spare you my ravings and get right to the good stuff with a Rambling from Midgit!
Midgit has a new page full of wonderful fiction which is listed below the ramble so .. stop by and enjoy! Now on with MIDGIT!!
I've had an idea for a war story rattling around in my brain for a couple of years now, but other projects have always seemed to come along and delay the starting of it.
When I finished Cold I decided to write something light and funny, so began Heat Wave I wanted it to be a comedy, but didn't really want either of the two main characters to be the comedy relief. So I came up with a couple of ridiculous characters called Melanie and Steph.
A couple of dear friends allowed me to use their names, but that's really where the similarity ends. Mostly.
Even so, when chatting on IM with either of them, I was often instructed as to how their characters should behave. I told each of them, "It's not really you," on more than one ocassion.
The crazy police woman whose apparent intent to strip search Chris is quite evident was also based on a dear friend. Her character was a little closer to the real thing
As Heatwave was drawing to a conclusion I started getting a heap of mail enquiring about the sequel to A Little Piece of Paradise
A Handful of Heaven was the first and last time I attempted a sequel. I found I really had nothing new to say about the characters. I wasn't getting any feedback whatsoever about the story, and gave up. I had also had the idea for Cold, and that image of the picture in the gallery just wouldn't leave me alone.
But now maybe I've learned a little patience as a writer, and will be able to write about the more mundane every day things that folks go through when they settle down to a peaceful life. So I'm going to have another go at the sequel. And just maybe I can come up with some earth moving event to spice up their life
The war story has been started, and I'll write bits of that in between. It won't be a nice story. War is ugly, that's all the disclaimers will say.
I'll also be starting to get Cold ready for publication, so some of my time will be taken up with that.
In the meantime, I'd like to plug my friend, Advocate's new story, .The Last Train Home It's beautifully beta read, you'll notice
So, as the Academy has deemed this to be Feed The Bards Month, take a moment to send a bard a mail. It's a small way to show appreciation for many hours work.
midgit
Let Midgit know how much you have enjoyed her ramblings and thank her for the time and talent she has shared with us with her stories!!
Good Day! I have a fun ramble for you today from a great bard Anne Anzel and some wonderful fiction by some very talented bards!
So without further ado..here's Anne:
Hi There!
I was standing the other day in the parking lot of where I work looking at a nasty dent and scratch in the side mirror of my new vehicle. I’d got her only four days before. It is moments like this from which serial killers are born.
What really pissed me off was the felony was most likely committed by one of my colleagues slamming their door open as they arrived late for work or rushing for a quickie at lunch. I looked up at my office. Even now the savage is probably peeking through the office blinds with that smug look of having got away with murder. May the bone in his/her nose mold!
North America’s love affair with the car is well documented. I lost my innocence to the heat of desire at an early age when I discovered boats and cars were always addressed as females. How perfect! My first car was a beat up old Pontiac station wagon. She might have been around the block a few times but in her I learned a thing or two.
What is this strange passion for one’s vehicle? Is it the way she purrs for you in the early morning light? The vibration of excitement as you slip into her and turn her over? The drive? The getting there? Or perhaps it is those surprising little delights such as the four on the floor. Aaah, the simple pleasures of deviation from the straight and narrow.
In North America, one’s vehicle is more than transportation it is an extension of ego and on most mornings your better half. My road partner has been viciously attacked and I am feeling the profound cruelty of fate heavily on my heart. One thing is for sure fixing my baby is going to be far more expensive and time consuming than a simple penicillin shot. My rambles on the subject anyway.
Please email Anne and thank her for her ramble and many wonderful stories at:
Now for some fiction!!
Hi, folks! Remember me? You know, that rambling lady person who kinda
hasn't rambled recently? Owner of the Purple Plaything (it's a scooter,
really!) and owned by Tango the Wonder Kitty? Yep, that's me.
So. How's life been lately? For me, it's getting better. I had some
crappy real life stuff rear its ugly head, but things are working out. So
I'm back and I want to ramble.
But, wait, there's more! This is a two-for-one ramble, friends! See below
for a very spiffy ramble from Lois Kay, author of The Reef. That's
right. More ramble for your money.
On to ramblin'...
I will, of course, start with some Tango stuff. Always entertaining, he
is. The other day, the ceiling fan in the family room was on, and I made
the mistake of picking Tango up. It was then he discovered he was *much*
closer to the ceiling fan then he'd ever been. So he proceeded to get up
on my shoulders and just stand there, staring at the fan. For several minutes.
We interrupt this important ramble to stop Tango from clawing my pant leg.
** interrupted ramble **
Thank you for your patience. The matter has been resolved. The Wonder
Kitty is presently rolling around on a chair, trying to get the attention
of my dog, Kira. Oh, wait, I have ice cream on my fingers...
** interrupted ramble **
Dang. Sorry about that. Say, tell you what. I'm tired and really should
sleep or something, so how about I let the lovely and rambling Lois Kay
take over. Hit it, Lois...
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Hi, my name is Lois. Raven asked me to ramble, since it's 'Feed the
Bards' month. I have to admit I was pleasantly surprised to be asked. I
hope I will ramble right. If it's anything like writing a grocery list, I
will fail miserably. I always forget to write down half of what we need and
the things I do write down I manage to leave at the store
Those of you who don't know me, I am the Dutchie who wrote 'The Reef'.
I have never rambled before, unless you count my story
So, as you will understand, The Reef brought me a lot of happiness! In a
way I never expected. BTW, for those of you who are interested, our love
story has been published in the ' How Xena changed my life' book, together
with lots of other great experiences.
I am working on my second story, Ripples in Time. It's a co-production, my
sweetie is helping me out! (happy face). The idea was born when we were in
Limburg (southern part of the Netherlands) last year, visiting the ruins of
an old castle. All the historical facts, the beauty of it's nature and our
own imagination gave birth to the idea.
The story is set way back during the Roman occupation of the Southern part
of The Netherlands, around 100 AD. Unlike The Reef, this story will have a
Xena and Gabrielle look alike, so I guess that will qualify it as real Uber
material.
Since my better half is a history freak, she's doing a lot of the research.
And she gives me advice on the story itself. It works out great. Soon the
story will be out there for all you hungry, fanfic eating people. You can
read your little hearts out. Like I would do, if I had more time
I have to admit, sometimes I sneak out of my daily responsibilities and
read, read, read! I download a story onto my laptop, take the machine with
me to bed, settle in and....enjoy the ride! Last story I read is Kenya, by
Anne Azel. If you haven't read it yet, please do. It's great! (that reminds
me, I still have to send her some feeback) And of course I keep up with
Missy Good's stories.
Finally I would like to express my appreciation to Raven and all the other
BeyondUber people, for coming up with the idea of a 'Feed the
bard' month. From experience I know how motivating it is, to hear from
those 'out there' who read fanfic. It helps to get some feedback when
struggling with a scene or storyline. It helped me to try harder. And it's
nice to feel appreciated as a bard.
I received quite some feedback, especially in the early days of my story
and sometimes people were so full of praise, I had to read the part I just
put up to make sure they were talking about me
To all of you who ever fed me: Thank y' all! I will do my best to keep
feeding you with my musings!
Lois
The Reef:
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Note from Celine: Feed the Bards, or I'll sick Tango the Wonder Kitty on you!
What's New:
Hey There!!
Well I now know why I don't take time off work.. I think the piled work could quite cover my desk if appropriately stacked ;) Oh well so I have a ton of work but I did not want you all to suffer.. as many of you may have experienced the Monday After experience. I know that my favorite escape from this madness is reading my favorite fiction, so here you go..
Opps almost forgot.. I have a special ramble treat for you!
I would like you all to welcome one of my favorite authors: Redhawk!!! I highly recommend her stories on the net and published!!!
Now on with her ramble
I'm not much of a rambler by nature. (Just check out my email list.
Getting a discussion going for longer than four or five days is a chore!)
Hence, I haven't availed myself of the opportunity here despite an earlier
invitation. However, with 'Warlord Metal' now on the market, I thought I'd
give it a go.
I'm pretty sure I've gone over where 'Warlord Metal' originally came from in
my online author's note as well as in the book. Ultimately, it boils down
to a single song by the band Sevendust called 'Face.' I had already been
toying around with a rock and roll short story and when I heard this tune
describing a rape I seriously wondered who would write such stuff. The
lyrics are ambiguous enough to indicate a possible S&M connection rather
than a real rape and following the previous line of thought, I wondered what
it would be for a WOMAN to write this song.
Originally, the short story I had planned was Sonny as the older sister of
the drummer and Torrin the lead singer. Sonny was a martial arts instructor
who was dragged to a concert where her brother was debuting with an already
well known band he'd just been hired by. Imagine my surprise when it simply
didn't work out and Sonny lost about fifteen years of age!
Once Sonny's age dropped, I had to figure a way to expand the storyline.
That's where the journal entries came into play. By using her journal, I
was able to portray years passing with relative ease as well as allowing the
reader to have an extreme sneak peek at how she viewed her world. And I was
very leery of having Sonny and Torrin become lovers before they were legal
age.
Torrin, however, was an easy one. Once I tagged her as the writer of
'Face,' her personality just came into play. She's the bad girl, living on
the streets and only for the moment. From personal experience with
homelessness and having met homeless youth, I was easily able to give the
reader a general overview of the world in which Torrin was living.
I've had a LOT of email about 'Warlord Metal,' almost more than any of my
other stories combined. None have been negative though all have stated how
hard it was to read. Torrin's addictions and abuse reactions were extremely
tough, not just to the reader but to me as well. Hehehehe... When the
story was finally completed and I handed the last chapter to my wife, she
said, "So...Where did this come from?" All I could answer was, "I dunno."
I'd have to say that the published version of 'Warlord Metal' is better than
the one online. The manuscript went through eight edits and my editor,
Cindy from Fortitude Press, is a real gem! I even wrote extra scenes to
flesh Torrin's character out further. One definitely made it into the book
and a second was integrated into the birthday party scene at the warehouse.
Both give better insight into Torrin's soul and why she is the way she is.
There will be a sequel to 'Warlord Metal' though I have no title at the
moment. The chapters are already outlined. It's just a matter of time
before I finish my current project, 'On Azrael's Wings,' and move on.
Rather than use song lyrics at the beginning and end of each chapter as I
did in the first book, I'm going to be using excerts of Torrin's court
hearing when she was fourteen years old.
I think I've about rambled enough! Thanks for listening! You can email me
at redhawk@djordanredhawk.net.
Redhawk
Be sure to write Redhawk and let her know her work is appreciated!!!
Now on with some fiction!!
This annoucement was posted on Mary D's website check it out it looks great:
Hey There!!
I hope you all had a great weekend! I spontaniouly went out of town and so I am sorry for the lack of updates. As I have just gotten home I have a small post and another ramble from a great author!
I will tell you all about my trip and catch up on any missed fiction or inquiries tomorrow. Now here again for your enjoyment is the wonderful author of The Bluest Eyes in Texas... Linda Crist!!
Another ramble, so soon? Okie dokie. I'm not even going to try to touch the cleverness and humor of some of your recent ramblers, so any comedy in this here ramble is purely a coincidence. (grin)
I've been asked a few times how I get ideas for stories and how I come up with titles. Since this *is* Beyond Uber, I'll skip covering X&G stories and stick to uber/beyond uber.
The titles question is fairly easy. As long as my stories are set in Texas, they will have something about Texas in the title, either the name of the state itself, or a river, or a city, etc. I thought about always using song titles, but since I'm currently writing about 1900 Galveston, and the only song I could think of is that Glen Campbell one, I ditched that idea. It's called "Galveston 1900: Swept Away." I'll discuss it in a bit here.
In the last ramble I mentioned that I got some of my ideas for Bluest Eyes from a very dull seminar I attended. Ideas come from all over the place. I've got a sequel for Bluest Eyes sitting on the back burner, title as yet not settled (it may be called "The Red and Rio Grande" or possibly "Texas Tea"). It will pick up where Bluest Eyes left off, more or less.
My office has a lot of cases in South Texas, near the Texas/Mexico border. It is a rather colorful area of the country, and it has its own politics, which you must learn if you are to survive in the business world down there. Often hilarious and bizarre things happen in border towns, especially during legal procedings, and I hope to convey some of that color in the sequel. (grin)
Texas still has a large oil and petroleum industry. Bluest Eyes was more or less Carson's coming of age story or coming out story. The sequel is going to be more of Kennedy's story. She's going to get into some adventures and misadventures, and maybe solve a few mysteries while she works on some geophysical cases down in South Texas. Carson will be along for the ride, providing her own perspective on things. Oil wells, as a general rule, is a dry subject matter from a legal standpoint. However, it's a competitive and sometimes underhanded industry, as Kennedy is going to find out while getting her feet wet in a new area of the law.
Meanwhile, if you've read my story "Moondancers' Delight" in the anthology "At First Blush," or if you've read my Academy of Bards Halloween short story entry, "Soul Vessels," you were introduced to a couple of pirates. I do not know where these lady pirates came from -- they just popped into my head from out of the blue. Maybe I've watched "Hook" one too many times. Anyway, nearly all the feedback I got was "we want to know more about the pirates." So that story is also on a back burner, until such time as I finish a couple other stories and have time to do research.
The idea for my current project, "Galveston 1900: Swept Away," came from a friend on one of the lists. She simply said, "I'd like to see an uber set in 1900 Galveston, the year it was destroyed by a hurricane." And I said, "Hmmmmmmmmm." I tucked the idea away and it grew on me. Now it won't leave me alone and I'm about 3 chapters into it. If you aren't familiar with the history, in 1900, the island of Galveston, Texas was destroyed by a massive hurricane. Some 6,000 people were killed. It still remains the single greatest disaster in American history (exclusive of war) in terms of loss of life, greater even than the tragedies of September 11th this past year.
The story I'm writing is centered on two women who lived on the island at that time. It's out of the norm for me, and I've broken all kinds of *rules,* but I think my personal style is still intact. It is beyond uber, the characters don't look like Lucy and Renee, although I guess readers could "slide" those faces in place if they want to. My prototypes are Claudia Christian and Alexandra Tydings. The story is full of angst, no surprise there, I'll wager. Angst is my forte. With angst comes hurt/comfort, dontcha see. (g) Life for women in 1900 was no picnic, I've discovered, and that comes out in full force in the story. However, as my list readers know, I have certain rules about stories, and my rules are still intact.
I will eventually post the story to the various websites, but not until it's complete. It's a much more complicated story, historically, than anything else I've written, so it will get some major editing after I finish it, before posting. If folks want to read it in progress, they can join one of my lists. I have the unedited complete chapters in file folders at each list. I have an updates only list (no chat) at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/texbardupates and a chat/updates list at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/texbard. That's where I'm posting the story in progress. Folks can find links to buy books or read other stories at my website: http://home.earthlink.net/~texbard.
So, that's how I come up with titles and ideas, and what I'm currently working on. Thanks for the ramble.
Now on with some fiction!
Hey There!!
Next I am announcing that each of you may want to be sure you join us here Beyond Uber each day as with this being Bard Appreciation month and all. Well I contacted a few of my favorite authors and they have agreed to Ramble.. so I am working to have a brand new ramble from these gifted writers each and every post!!!
Now for our 1st Ramble of this Appreciation month we wanted to get started on the right foot and I now present Barbara Davies!
Her works can be found on
Now on with her Ramble:
Raven tells me that July is Bird Appreciation Month (probably something
to do with her name). So, thank you, Raven, for asking me to ramble.
I love feeding the birds. They get a seed mix (including sunflower
hearts) and water, plus occasional treats: suet, apple cores, bread, and
porridge oats. These are British birds, I might add. So they drink their
water with their pinky fingers sticking out, wipe their bums on quilted
paper, and come over all embarrassed when you mention sex... NOT.
As in the Xenaverse, there is a pecking order when it comes to feeding
the birds. For some reason, I always make their breakfast before I make
my own. (Don't even go there.) Top of the heap is the feral pigeon (the
kind that little old ladies insist on feeding in crowded town squares).
I'm always squirting it with my Buck Rogers water pistol, but it sneaks
back. I hate that f***ing pigeon! It's a stalker if ever I saw one!
Er herm... Where was I? Oh, yes. You would expect the magpie that likes
to dunk its bread in the water bowl (maybe its still waiting for its
false teeth to be delivered?) to come next in rank. But no, a collared
dove half its size can send it pecking... I mean packing. Then come the
blackbirds and robins, my favorites because they are so friendly and
sing like a ... well, like a bird. Listening to a blackbird singing its
little heart out on a still morning can send shivers down my spine... or
give me a headache. It depends what I was doing the night before.
The blackbirds raised two chicks this year. One minute it was all oohing
and aahing (from me) as they fed them, the next dreadful squawking (from
the parent birds). A cat was attacking the chicks! I hurtled outdoors
and chased it away (the water pistol, since you ask) but I will never
forget the feel of the injured chick in my hands as I carried it indoors
and called the RSPCA ambulance. (They treated it in their animal
hospital. I hope it made it.)
Since then, an expensive infrared gadget keeps the f***ing cats away.
(At least I assume it does. Its beeps are outside the range of human
hearing, so it could be an elaborate scam.)
But back to the pecking order. Starlings are noisy, gregarious, and
amazing puzzle-solvers. The feeder is squirrel-proofed, and only small
birds should be able to get to the seeds. Wrong. The starlings can
contort themselves into positions the Kama sutra has yet to explore! As
for the sparrows. Dull brown, tuneless chirping birds they may be, but
they are always entertaining. They seem to go about in flocks, and are
always bonking or squabbling (the two things are probably connected).
Reminds me of the Xenaverse again! And finally, the tits (plenty of
those in the Xenaverse too) and finches (and the occasional wren).
When I first began bird feeding, I envisioned lots of tiny, colorful,
exotic birds coming to feed. Scratch that! I have had precisely one
goldfinch and one longtailed tit. (The latter are supposed to be found
in flocks. Maybe the others were disguised as sparrows?)
So there you have it. Appreciate the birds. I certainly do.
What's that, Raven? _Bard_ Appreciation Month? Oh, sh**!!!
--
Barbara
uh.. um...Thank you Barbara....
Barbara Davies Email )Feel free to appreciate or abuse .. I forget which!
Now on with the Fiction:
As you may have noticed above you will now see a lovely banner "Feed The Bards!!"
This is a direct link to Academy of Bard and a great opportunity to remind you that without these wonderful authors .. how would we spend our day :) So July is offically Bard Appreciation Month!!
The Bard Academy has an incentive for you to write your bards:
With lots of people noticing and talking about how feedback to the
writers is down, we here at the Academy decided to do something about
it! We are declaring July as "Feed the Bards" month. What we would
like for you, the readers, to do is every time you send a note to a
bard, cc or bcc us at feedthebards@yahoogroups.com. On July 31st,
send us a tally of how many bards you took a minute to thank and
whoever has the highest number will get a token of our appreciation
from the Academy.
So go on now and make a special effort to tell your favorite authors that you appreciate them .. and beg for more!!!
In Books On Tape News: Words Heard in Silence have only 17 of these wonderful tape sets available! Run Don't Walk To Get Your Set!!
Now on with some fiction!!!!!
so those interested might want to change their
bookmarks.
Chase Marin is a girl with a mind all her own starting herfirst year of college at the University of Arizona. Fighting the pressures of her family her entire life, it's her time to shine and be what and who she wants to be. Dagny Robertson is a grad student teaching an undergrad Psychology course where she sees a young woman who had meant so much to her when she had been younger. Chase had been her charge during Dagny's fourteenth year, and she had never forgotten the young girl who's spirit and enthusiasm for life had touched her so deeply. Now that young girl is her charge yet again as a Freshman in her Psych 101 class.
Raven Recommends!
Continuing story. Raven Recommends!
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The Watcher and the Protector is a fantasy set in Hibernia (Ireland) around 235 BC. Brynn, a warrior, and Caitlin, a druid, have shared a special kind of friendship called 'anam cara' since they were young. Halfway through her druid training at Alba, Cait abruptly leaves and returns home. Unwilling to discuss the reason why, she persuades Brynn and their companions to travel the world but Cait finds she can't run forever for the dark force that caused her to leave is following both her and Brynn and they must return home to face it. Revolving around the first cycle of the Celtic year, Samhain, this story emphasizes friendship, faith, and trust and involves Celtic gods and goddesses, druids, ancient prophecies, and destinies.
Forces of Evil takes place in New York state in a small Catskills resort town. As the story unfolds, two female undercover agents from separate agencies meet, and join forces to try to decipher and stop a diabolical plot of world domination from reaching its climax. As they find themselves falling helplessly in love, adding a new dimension to their jobs, and another set of priorities, the team races to a cliffhanger conclusion.
Raven Reocmmends!
Thursday July 24, 2002
Raven's Ravings by Raven
Continuing story. Raven Recommends
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Continuing story. Raven Recommends
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Complete Story! Raven Highly Recommends!
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Continuing story. This site is frequently updated for sections of story as well!
Monday July 22, 2002
Random Ramblings by Celine
cbzeer@attbi.com
http://cbzeer.home.attbi.com
War is brewing in Salum Town, NY. There is a new vampire, ambitious, sexy, and ready to rumble. She wants to be the queen of all the vampires, and it is up to a group of vampire friends to stop her. Continuing story.
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Complete. Summary previously posted.
Summary pending.
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Sunday July 21, 2002
Raven's Ravinging by Raven
Be sure to email and let her know how much you have enjoyed her stories!!
This is the story of the vampires of Salum Town. The story centers on Leandra Montes, and how she becomes one of the undead.
This Novel is called "Noemí," and it's the story of a woman in deep pain and in need of something... something she lost when her dearest lover died. Terri is a young woman in search of love, sometimes finding it in the wrong places, and maybe finally finding it in the right place this time around… Take a look at this Novel, and enjoy the passions, the emotions of its characters...
Continuing story.
Continuing story..A story of what it's like to find that one person you know you are meant to
be with and then trying to get her! Not always easy, and not always without
consequence... follow Fox as she tries to do just that.
Fiction's Love & Romance pages. [alt, original]
First Light is set in the UK, and explores the characters of Nia and Jake,
two women thrown together by their respective connections to the British
Mafia. Follow their ups and downs, as they strive to build a relationship
amidst the intrigue and danger that surrounds them…
Continuing story...
The Vestal's community is coming apart by inches. Dire secrets once held
firmly under control threaten to come to light as tensions mount due to an
ailing sister member. Delia, a Vestal entering her eleventh year of service,
stumbles upon the impediments, but can she report to officials what she has
found?
Disturbing scene warnings are listed at the beginning of this story.
Letter to America' is a rather dark piece that focuses on the feelings of a
woman imprisoned in a refugee camp at a time of war.
Warning - the imagery
and language used, and the emotions expressed, are not pretty.
Saturday July 20, 2002
Raven's Ravinging by Raven
Well I am on the run as I have a babysitting assignment with my cute and fun nephew so I will save you my ramblings and treat you to another great author!
http://www.geminifiction.com
Continuing story.Raven Highly Recommends!
Conclusion Raven Recommends!
Continuing story. Raven Recommends!
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Dylan Hawke is a young Military Police Officer with deadly fighting skills. But nothing could have prepared her for the mission she was about to face. Death is all around her, will her training be enough?
Continuing story.
Friday July 19, 2002
Random Ramblings by Celine
by K. Simpson (KSimpson@the-devils-workshop.com)
http://www.the-devils-workshop.com
Continuing story.
Darlene and Teri have been neighbors for months. Both Teri and her infant daughter Lucy adore their attractive neighbor. This is the story of how two neighbors become bosom buddies and much, much more.
The setting is a small town outside of Los Angeles. A "first time" uber/original (except that characters physically resemble a certain warrior and bard - physically - that's where the resemblance ends, I think) tale. Megan is a mechanic who comes across a stranded woman (Jodie). Megan helps her out but ends up getting more than she bargained for. Continuing story.
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Revised parts of previously posted story. Now ends with part 16. Conclusion.
Thursday July 18, 2002
Raven's Ravings by Raven, Just little ole Me :)
Raven Recommends!!!!!!! Enjoy!!
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Continuing story Raven Recommends!
Continuing Story .. Raven Recommends
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Continuing story. Raven Highly Recommends.. Hot Stuff :)
Tuesday July 16, 2002
Random Ramblings by Celine
Luxury car dealer Anna Kaklis and family attorney Lily Stuart meet by fate and work together to overcome an extraordinary challenge. Can their courage also help them conquer their fears of love? Complete. ******Raven and Celine Highly Recommend*****
Continuing story.
A rather dark piece that focuses on the feelings of a woman imprisoned in a refugee camp at a time of war. Warning - the imagery and language used, and the emotions expressed, are not pretty.
Continuing story.
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Monday July 15, 2002
Random Ramblings by Celine
(Okay! We'll take your 4-drawer pine chest and replace it with a nice oak six-drawer! But you have to give it back tomorrow.)
Jerry Springer: I'm Having a Lesbian Affair With My Own Daughter
(You know me, I'll all for lesbians, but really... keep your family out of it!)
(But Sally, you're not a bad looking woman! And, really, it's all about inner beauty, after all... at least, that's what I, personally, am banking on. ;) )
dsbauden@attbi.com
http://dsbauden.com
Set several months after their commitment ceremony, Lex and Amanda try to settle down into a normal life. As usual, things don't go smoothly for either of them. Amanda struggles to come to terms with what she wants for the future, while Lex fights for everything that is important to her. Continuing story. *****Celine Recommends*****
The sequel of To The Manor Sold finds Tess and Jordan continuing their pursuit of freedom and each other. Continuing story.
Limburg, The Netherlands, 100 AD. The Roman conqueror occupies a large part of the Lowlands. Even though times are peaceful, underneath the surface opposition brews and occasionally the Romans have to fight a rebel army. In this setting, Mor and Isa meet, when Isa is running for her life. The dark, seclusive Mor saves Isa's life, not anticipating the impact that will have on her life. She had a mission. Will she be able to carry it out? Continuing story.
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Sunday July 15, 2002
Raven's Ravings by Raven, Just little ole Me :)
M- "No you do it"
C- "I don’t want to do it"
M- "Sod off, you are doing it"
C- "Okay, there is only one way to solve this"
C/M -"Coin toss!"
· I don’t get it
· Kiss my ass
· You Yanks destroy the English language
· Did you write this in the dark?
· Yes, yes, yes... okay... just stop going on about it
· Okay... tell me where I’m supposed to laugh
· Don’t make me come over there
· Oh no, don’t rush your part. Any time before I claim my pension will be fine
Conclusion Raven HIGHLY Recommends!!!!
Continuing story Raven Recommends
The first entry in a series of tales about the courtship of Xena (in the guise of the Scottish warrior, Jesstin) and Gabrielle (appearing here as the lovely Lady Aria
Set in 1815, this uber was inspired by the works of Jane Austen and
Georgette Heyer. When Napoleon's army forces Joanna, Viscountess
Norland, to flee Paris, she returns reluctantly to England. While
staying with her brother in Kent, Joanna encounters the charming Miss
Frederica Bertram
Complete!! Raven Recommends!!!!
Saturday July 13, 2002
Raven's Ravings by Raven, Just little ole Me :)
Midgit now has a domain of her own. Check it out and enjoy her works!!
Raven Recommends!
Lex and Amanda are back in this wonderful new tale by the wonderous Carrie Carr
Raven Highly Recommends!
The Vestal's community is coming apart by inches. Dire secrets once held firmly under control threaten to come to light as tensions mount due to an ailing sister member. Delia, a Vestal, entering her eleventh year of service stumbles upon the impediments, but can she report to officials what she has found?
Meet Kelly Cavanaugh and Susan McGovern. Kelly is a Regional Manager for
Saks, a posh chain of clothing stores. Susan, formerly homeless due to her
prejudiced parents, is now working for ForOthers, Inc. a company helping
others like herself and others still living in the streets. It¹s the tender
story of two women fighting internal battles of abandonment, loss and love.
You continually pass by people who may or may not enter your life. What if
the person you are destined to love, sits on the very corner you pass
everyday?
Raven Recommends
Meet Frankie Camarelli, your ordinary, everyday owner of a movie memorabilia shop, until, that is, she starts hearing a voice in her dreams that transports her more than twenty years into the past. Bewildered at her predicament, she meets the person attached to the voice, Annie Parker, a waitress and a student at Loyola University. Annie and Frankie become friends, and just when Frankie convinces Annie that she doesn't need to be abused by her boyfriend any longer, Frankie finds herself back in the present. Feeling the pain of losing a new friend, Frankie enlists the help of her best friend, Crystal, and together they do everything in their power to find Annie again. This is a tale that defies the odds of reason, belief, and the power of love and friendship. Using a gift so rare to most, Crystal shows Frankie the true meaning of unconditional love..
Raven Recommends
Nurturing Souls is a story of a young girl, Alicia, who has lost her parents
to a horrible car accident. She moves to Montana from Chicago to live with
her Aunt Edna on her ranch to try and rebuild her life. There she meets,
Sydney, an Australian woman who tends to the animals on Edna's ranch. The
two become fast friends and soon after, lovers. Alicia must go back to
Chicago to sell her parents home. Syd's past comes out to haunt her while in
Chicago and puts Ally and Syd's love to the test.
Raven Recommends
Trina is unemployed and bored. She ventures to places she's never been for the plain excitement of it. Today she finds more excitement than she bargains for when she meets Mac at the Quality Video store.
Raven Recommends
Terri is a young woman nervously waiting to board her flight to Houston. She is seated at the gate, but she feels as though she is being watched. Her mind is racing from confusion and perhaps, arousal. A mysterious woman
guarantees that this would be a flight Terri would always remember.
Raven Recommends
Continuing story Parts 1 - 5.
Complete story.
Complete story.
Complete story.
Complete story.
Muriel is swept by the most beautiful unnerving tidal wave she'd ever seen. Will she survive?
What happens when two people from drastically different worlds, who possess rigidly defined ideas about themselves and their society, are suddenly thrown together? Dr. Leigh Lukas, a research scientist, and Kendrick Ashwright, a failed actor-turned-drug addict, are both struggling to find answers to the painful questions in their lives. Whether or not they can find those answers -- or help each other find them -- depends entirely on whether they can get past the boundaries they've each drawn in their minds.
Friday July 12, 2002
Raven's Ravings (by Raven.. who else?
a_azel@hotmail.com
Short futuristic alternative Über The Request is a continuation of Cybotic Love.
Wednesday July 10, 2002
Random Ramblings by Celine
loisk@hotmail.com
http://www.amazontrails.com/fiction/reef1.htm
This short story is a sequel of sorts to the stories "Rising Into
Consciousness" and "Duality". It is advisable to read them first. Auset and
Reese are faced with a rather perplexing mystery, as dead chickens begin to
appear on Auset's front door step. As the usual suspects are all locked up,
the question remains, who's doing it and why? Follow our gals on a silly
little romp to unravel the mystery all while struggling to spend some
quality time with one another.
Continuing story. *****Celine Recommends*****
Continuing story.
Revised version of previously posted story.
Conclusion.
Continuing story.
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Tuesday July 9, 2002
Raven's Ravings (by Raven.. who else?)
Shadow and Scooter, two staff at a youth summer camp meet, and find themselves facing an unusual attraction. But will they be able to get past their private demons to come together? Continuing story.
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Completed story.
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Complete.
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Monday July 8, 2002
Raven's Ravings (by Raven.. who else?)
~ Linda Linda Crist Email) Let her know how much you enjoy her stories!!
Continuing story part 7.
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Complete story.
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Wednesday July 3, 2002
Raven's Ravings (by Raven.. who else?)
Raven Highly Recommends!!!!!!
Well Folks.. so much for starting off on the right foot... you may email and abuse our Bird Feeding Bard at:
Continuing story.
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Oh I just couldn't resist spoofing the song "Feed the Birds" from the musical "Mary Poppins". Totally inspired by this month's (July) 'Feed the Bards' theme.
What happens when a repressed writer innocently ventures out onto her balcony, only to find her suicidal neighbor poised to jump?
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Tuesday July 2, 2002
Raven's Ravings (by Raven.. who else?)
Taylor Rickard
Continuing story. Raven Recommends!
Complete
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The Beyond Uber What's New from June has been archived